Want More Quality Time With Your Child? Start Here

Ever heard the phrase, “Take care of the pennies and the pounds take care of themselves”?

I’m English-born... so it’s one that stuck.

But what if the same were true with time and parenting?

“Take care of the minutes and the hours take care of themselves.”
— Lord Chesterfield

In a recent Stressed to Best Parent Method session, a parent asked me,
“How can I connect more with my child in the time I have?”

And it’s such a great question... because we often think we need hours to connect deeply. But actually, children make meaning out of minutes.

Time with your child is never just time. It’s what that time says to them:

I believe I’m worthy of your attention.
I believe I matter to you.
I believe someone enjoys spending time with me.
I believe fun still belongs here, even when life is full.
I believe I’m important... because someone made space for me.

These meanings form early... and they last.

My friend, Dr Irena O’Brien, founder of The Neuroscience School, explains how our thoughts become self-fulfilling prophecies. So when you invest in moments, you’re helping embed useful beliefs in your child’s mind that will support them for life.

So how do we increase the quality of the moments we have?

By changing our experience of time.

Because time... is a concept. But our experience of time? That’s a perception.

In any given moment, your experience of time is shaped by your thoughts, beliefs, emotions, expectations — and the past stories that sit quietly in the background.

Let me show you how this works...

Experience of time moving fast...

I’ve got 5 minutes. I want some time with Luke. What should I play with him that he’ll enjoy? Once I’m done playing, I need to finish dinner. I know what the kids are having... but what will I make for us? I’ll check the fridge...

Meanwhile, you’re sitting next to Luke... but you’re miles away in your head. The five minutes pass. Neither of you feels fulfilled.

Experience of time moving slow...

I’ve got 5 minutes. I want some time with Luke. What would he love right now?

He’s already building LEGO.

You sit down next to him...
No dialogue in your head.
You hear his sounds... his giggles... his questions.
You join him... and you’re fully there.

Those 5 minutes feel like 15.

You move on to the next task... feeling nourished.

He goes back to playing... feeling seen and loved.

The difference wasn’t the amount of time. It was the amount of presence.

When we learn to lead our thoughts instead of being led by them, our relationship with time changes. Our connection deepens.

It takes practice. But it gets easier.

And not every moment with your child has to be quality time.

Just a few good quality moments a week can make a profound difference.

Penny for your thoughts...?

If you want to deepen your connection with your child without needing more time and shift how you experience your days so they feel lighter and more fulfilling, I’d love to show you how inside the Stressed to Best Parent Method. We focus on the inner shifts that create outer ease. Explore more here.